Paul Maden

Trophy Designer and Software Engineer

Relieved

The extremity I am recording is one of relief, the day of my degree ceremony.

Specifically the time in the main hall when my name was called out and I climbed the stairs to receive my prize, an A4 sheet of paper printed with the magic words…

“Yay you finally passed, bringing to an end to five years of hell, for you and for us. No more staying up all night writing pages of waffle and jargon, no more sitting in a crowded room watching a beardy weirdy explaining the grammar of a constructed language consisting of 50+ symbols and no words. No more halls of residence plagued by drum and bass merchants and high pitched lily livered fops. And for us no more having to put up with your poor attendance, apparent lack of interest and it has to be said unerring ability to present half completed coursework for assessment not less than ten minutes before the final deadline.”