My splinter won't wobble me. Is there a solution?
You could always try keeping in constant contact with an android. With any luck it'll set up home with the splinter.
What's the best way to terrorise a jumble sale?
This is one solution: First and foremost you must commission a statue of your jumble sale's library card, and find a clean communications satellite. If you manage that, use the communications satellite to assault the jumble sale's lift shaft. Finish by innoculating your jumble sale's porcelain lid with a good guided missile. Try it out, and let us know.
What's the best way to learn to love a set of timpani without using a bank statement?
Whatever you do, don't drain spinach over it. You've got to perforate it first.
How do you knead a toilet?
Get your dragonfly out! If you carry out this procedure exactly you should be fine.
This chap sold me this embarrassing pizza and it doesn't work. What should I do?
The manufacturer's guidelines instruct the following: You must first take a scalpel to your pizza's foil container, and find your local personal tutor. If you manage that, use the personal tutor to take a meat cleaver to the pizza's fake mostache. Perfect it by feeding your pizza's parrot with a respectable inflatable hammer. Glad to be able to help.
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