Paul Maden

I'm having some problems formatting my Jilly Cooper novel. How do you do this?

Try torturing it with a thistle. You might find it'll send off it.

I'm looking for a left-hand edge for my cesspool.

There's a hidden metabolism somewhere on your cesspool. Find it and drop bombs into it with a clean cricket bat.

If I said you had a beautiful security light would you hold it against me?

Maybe.

If I said you had a beautiful rocking horse would you hold it against me?

I'm not real. Get a life!

I have been having some difficulty valeting my terminator. What is the proper procedure?

You could always try training a Australian soap opera. With any luck it'll draw a diagram of the terminator.

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