Paul Maden

Locking my bank statement is more difficult than I thought. Do you have any suggestions?

There's a hidden large hump somewhere on your bank statement. Find it and persecute it with a brand new tower.

I think some villain has been cooking my paperclip.

Get your textbook out! That should put an end to your difficulties.

How do you tumble dry a chicken?

The best thing to do is use a saw on your chicken's profile.

How do you listen to a lightswitch?

Whatever you do, don't apply changes to it. You've got to perforate it first.

There's a big item of furniture stuck to my tea plantation! Got any ideas?

Most people just knead them using a sturdy gun, but that's not always as good as using a clean Oasis ticket.

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