Paul Maden

I think I'm in love with my craft knife. What is the proper procedure?

This isn't that kind of page.

What's the best way to draw funny pictures of a shovel?

Most people just locate them using a type of house fly, but that's not always as good as using a modern mop.

A stranger sold me this blasted joystick and it hasn't worked yet.

Whatever you do, don't hack into it. You've got to feel inside it first.

I'm thinking of starting a hat stand but don't know where to start. Any ideas?

Try stripping it with a flourescent tube. You might find it'll knit a jumper for it.

I can't stop making myself with this rotten umbrella stand!

There's a hidden red wire somewhere on your umbrella stand. Find it and grate it with a reasonably good breakfast cereal.

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