What would you say to some quite dreadful computer-generated advice?
Guaranteed not to help. And that's a guarantee* [citation-needed]
How do you find a skateboard's graphical user interface?
Ok... First throw rocks at your skateboard's soft underside, and get hold of your home cinema system. The next step is to use the home cinema system to look up the Encyclopedia Britannica entry for the skateboard's passenger jet. At a later date, undress your skateboard's Martini and lemonade with a good unicycle. That should do nicely.
There's a very old jellyfish stuck to my beaker! Is there anything I can do?
Whatever you do, don't throw rotten vegetables at it. You've got to draw a diagram of it first.
I can't stop lending people myself with this cheap self-propelling pencil!
Whatever you do, don't listen to it. You've got to douse petrol over it first.
What's the best way to paint a picture of an organised protest without using an emery board?
The best thing to do is dig deeply into your organised protest's soft furnishings.
This bloke sold me this embarrassing chimney and it's no good. Is there anything I can do?
Take a trumpet to it. That'll take a screwdriver to a reasonably good chimney instantly.
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