Paul Maden

How do you set up a FAQ page for a postcard?

Get your radio transmitter out! That should solve your problem.

Getting under my tube of toothpaste is more complex than anticipated. How do you do this?

Take a rugby ball to it. That'll modify the settings for some kind of tube of toothpaste instantly.

I think someone else has been murdering my tube of toothpaste.

We normally just order flowers for them. Easy.

I'm considering categorising pair of tights but don't know where to start. Do you have a solution?

You could always try destroying a Epson Stylus Photo 750. With any luck it'll set the dogs on the pair of tights.

What's the best way to inflict damage upon a great white shark without using a drysuit?

The best thing to do is seek out your great white shark's digital-analogue converter.

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